I've always prided myself that most of the "experience" I've had with guys has been on the soccer field and at the shooting range. However every girl has had her encounter with what we politely term the Jerkoff. The dude that slurks (my word) around looking for prey with a bag of painstakingly thought out moves to hook your attention...for the heck of it. Azzy is usually awesome at this sort of thing but I thought I'd give it a go: Nooj presents:
The Jerkoff Guide
*Disclaimer: There are sincere dudes who do these things without slurking intentions.
However be aware that these are a dying species and cannot be relied upon to be bona fide*
He compliments your friends when you've only mentioned them once in passing
He sms's you just when you have forgotten of his existence to say he's been waiting for a hello and couldn't take it any more
He remembers arb weird details of your life to make you think your every word is precious to his heart
He asks you arb weird details of your life tourettes-etly (my word)
You make a dumb joke and he says that was the cheering up he's needed all day and he is the happiest person ever right now.
He sometimes re-uses the same lines because he forgets that he used it on you already and not someone else.
Not a day passes without him finding a way to say how you think like no one else he's ever met.
He finds a reason to bring up how lost and lonely he is in every conversation, which of course leads you to make the dumb joke, which of course makes you his saviour...
