Between my shadow and my soul

There's something about...

This post will NOT begin with I. Ok that's over with :)

An issue that's been vibrating in many of you guys' minds has affected me too recently. Of peter parker and hidden identities and anonymity. It started with my colleagues saying that for someone in my profession blogging is not a great idea. And I look at other people's blogs and I admire their candid use of imagery and creating this persona that they use just here. It's beautiful how everything is linked and expressed. Unlike my idea for a blog- hey, let's use my name- flipping original innit? So I thought of taking someone's advice and omitting it. But that would mean I'd have to delete everything I've written because it's all related to Noorjehaan in some way and I would have nothing else to write. I'm a remix without a filter right now and I do believe that my honesty will hurt at some point and then thenooj will peace out.
I like Saaleha's header- "I wanna be a famous writer". Famous to me means you and at least one other person in the world thinks you made a difference. Everyone wants to be famous at something, don't you? I wanna be famous at facilitating. Just faciliating. On the floor , under a tree, in a classroom, in an office, at the beach. The thing I wanna facilitate is specific but I haven't named it yet. Also my header is childish but it is the only image I could create without cutting and pasting someone else's stuff so it's cool.
I painfully yet noisily supported Amakhosi on Saturday in patriotic vein. It makes more sense than supporting a team beased on players striving for higher pay. Like the fan thing on facebook, you support a product like Google which just wants to make money out of you. However, you support them based on quality and service, which I can identify with. Football players however choose a team based on pay and not the principles of the team. Football teams I guess strive for the best game plan and teamwork, but it's motivated simply by money- and so is Google. I think it's cool to support them but not to go crazy. Unlike a brand like Grass Rocks which I will put money and almost everything into. I am trying to avoid sentences that begin with "I" :P

Chinapit in an orange

Eons beyond
Jihad lost and won
Uranium breathes
Inner in,
As Lucas’s Darth
Or Harry’s Tom

A reminder
Of breaths
Not returned,
Now polluted,
It is important, to me
They be kept, not left

Stumble or More

The butterfly will pause wistfully on a branch. She will spy on the sand and the roots, in the few seconds she has. Then she will reluctantly flutter and lift off. Butterflies do not only care about making money for insurance adverts through the graceful arching and troughing of their delicate wings. They do not just enjoy being lightweight and miraculously beautiful, and having access to the most awesome experience ever, that of flying. They also remember a time, before the insidious cocoon, when looking for the next drop of nectar or a tree branch, or another butterfly was not their life’s purpose. They remember a time when they were content in their little world, close to the ground, surrounded by all they needed. A time when they weren’t exposed to a world that was higher and sweeter and freer. And they stumble.

A Mashed Mint

Circles that drown your abdomen
Instead of infusing whirls

*I am uncertain about the value of nariyah khatams

Leaves This Earth

The thing I like about my “culture” is
When someone leaves this earth
Dozens of people, knowing someone
Knowing that person, or not,
Come to support and pray and console
And even though it was my first time
Meeting this person’s memory, I think perhaps
The prayer-verses I sent for him, mean more
Than all the smiles and gratuities I would offer
In this Life.

Green Dust and Purple Steam

Ok so anyone with email will know this is a pic of the Northern Lights and not the Msa Camp.

But the last day to me looked like this. The entire thing was much like the wall climbing we did. The first three footholds drained all my energy. From then onwards I scrambled up and hit the silver roof with a bang so fast that as I was jumping back on my rope on the way down I had to blink to make sure it wasn't all a dream.
Time was the craziest thing it just kept slipping away. Most of the time I felt like Hammy from Over the Hedge when he drank Red Bull. Making decisions for up to 50 people made me have to think and act 50 times faster. And it was so worth it on the last day to see the green dust sprinkled all over. This is embodied in the quote by Eric Hoffer which is a friend's email signature: "In times of change, learners inherit the earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists" . And seeing this materialise loosened the grip of Unfulfilled Responsibilty from my heart. Not that I don't have so much more still to fulfill. But since my first camp I have needed to give back this life changing experience to others. It sounds like I'm romanticising Msa here but Msa is just an arbitrary bunch of letters put together. It means different things to different people and at different ages. Like the AnC its meaning can change in less than a decade. What we needed to punt was the objectives and goals of higher striving as youth. On that note I wish the AnC would invest in camps like these so that to prevent the creation of more Julius's and Fikile's. We can't bitch about the state of the next generation when we're doing fluck all to change it.

I love the architecture and vibe at Sun City. We go as families together and stay in chalets and swim and braai and chill in the relaxed atmosphere. The decor is facinating combining the heritage of Africa with a modern feel. The landscaping, greenery and facilities are so well planned that even though you no it is not natural you can't help be mesmerised by their beauty. But then you enter the entertainment centre and you look at the core purpose of all of this wowness. Pensioners feeding hundred rand notes into machines lovingly as if feeding leaves to a deer. We justify things that cannot be overlooked.

Personal Prayer

I seek refuge in the Lord of the Dawn

In His calm on my irascible impatience

His miracles in my desperate dreams

His mercy on my insurmountable insecurities

His pleasure reaping pliant purpose

How to Take Over the World

On days like these, on weeks like these. When strangers become the Malaaikah of the Battle of Badr and the cosmos tests your every insecurity, you need to own something. Light up some universe. Bless my subjects, the loyal epsom salts, radox lavender and deep heat bubbles; citizens of the noojverse that explode and implode at my will.